When our daughter was 4 months old, my parents were nice enough to stay over for the night so my wife and I could go to my company’s Christmas party. My wife had just finished breastfeeding, and I encouraged her to pull out (almost) all of the stops at the party, and (definitely) all the stops at the bar we went to afterwards.

So after a ’spirited’ 2 a.m. ride home, and with our daughter in a bassinet near my parents on the other side of the house (with the kitchen & living room between us), things let to…well, ‘things’. With the bedroom to ourselves for the first time in months, my wife and I were VERY loud. Yelling, smacking, scratching moaning, wet, hot, multiple-Os for both of us sex…

…which, unbeknownst to us until the next morning, was being broadcast over level 4 (loudest) over our baby monitor in our cathedral-ceiling living room.

Let yourself go and keep making up stories for the kids.